Saturday, September 10, 2011

3 in 30

I like this new challenge that I have seen on Sam's Noggin blog, I like 30 day goals, and I am going to take 3 things that I am already doing and have them as my 3 goals in 30 days.  I think this is a good way to stay on top of things that I am working on in my walk in life.

3in30 I'm In!!

My 3 goals:
  1. Finish reading the Bible in 90 Days.  This will end October 8th and by God's grace I will press on and finish it and continue hoping for a renewed relationship with the Lord and to learn things I have never learned before.
  2. Focus on feeding on God's Word and my relationship with Him and not food.  Take one moment at a time and learn to recognize my true hunger signals and with His help learn to stop when I am satisfied and not grab for more food.
  3. Internet breaks.  Finish reading my Bible in 90 Days reading before I "play" on the internet.  Reading email for work or quick things ok, but no playing on the internet until my reading is done.

More to you...Rest in Him

Friday, September 9, 2011

I had victories today praise God!! I want to highlight those and not all the failures I tend to want to focus on.  The Lord helped me today to realize I needed to cut out sweet drinks for a season.  I had mostly water and I had 1 1/2 coke zero.  

So many emotions and chaos in my heart and mind, I just am praying for stability and calmness in my Spirit and for the reality of how to stay in Jesus arms, rest in Him, constantly.  I know all the things around me can be an utter chaos, but my Spirit can still be resting in Him and full of peace and joy.  He is my stability.  Him alone.

I am a few days behind on my reading B90days, but will be catching up this weekend.  I have more time on my hands as I have just recently had a change in my work status and have more time now to be wife, mommy and homekeeper.  Praising God HE is my perfect provision.  

It will be well with my soul, that I trust

More to You, rest in Him <3

Thursday, September 8, 2011

Messy Day

Today was a messy day in eating.  Today was an all over the place kind of emotional day as well.  Bringing to mind to myself that my emotions cannot rule me or I will always be all over the place.  

My eating today started with fast food.  I was hungry so that is good but I did have trouble stopping.  It seems that is going to be something I am on my knees daily with, well should be that way anyways, but even more dependence and crying out with the desire to stop eating when I am satisfied.  I try to hold on to "more" when I don't need it.  That is what is causing my waistband to expand.

My next time that I ate I was not completely hungry but getting close.  I had a soft taco and started on a second, then felt the Lord saying I should stop that I was satisfied and would you know it, praise!!  I stopped, gave the rest to my hubby and just stopped.  I did eat a few bites of a brownie afterwards but then that was all.  I have to say that was a victory.  Thank you Lord, help me to not discount that as something because I did not do it all perfect.

The rest of the day I did eat when I was not hungry, had a bowl of chili I made for dinner and I was not all the way hungry, and really that just caused discomfort physically.  I didn't need it.

Main lesson learned today to sum it up in one word, what would it be......wait.

Wait on Him.  Wait for hunger.  Wait on His lead.  Wait before I jump into something I don't need.  Wait.

Screen bean character waiting patiently on top of an hourglass

More to you...

Wednesday, September 7, 2011

Mini Bible study from my friend Heidi

Reading back on Heidi's blog a few minutes ago I came to something perfect timing relating my last post and thoughts I have thought today.  This is the post, click here to read it and then I will post my answers below.

"Hebrews 12:1-4 says:
Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles, and let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us. Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God. Consider him who endured such opposition from sinful men, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart. In your struggle against sin, you have not yet resisted to the point of shedding your blood.

A short bible study for you...
1.) What are some things that could hold you back according to this passage above?
2.) What can you do about it according to this passage?
3.) What will that look like for YOU practically?
4.) What practices are you told to take part in according to this passage?
5.) To what degree did Jesus go in removing obstacles and hindrances?
6.) Take a moment and pray in response to these things!"

1. Some things that could hold me back according to the passage above?
Things holding me back are doubt, fear, LIES

2.  What can I do about it according to this passage?
I can throw them off and keep my eyes fixed on Jesus and persevere.  Fix my eyes on JESUS.  Simple truth.

3.  What will this look like for me practically?
Giving Jesus everything, all moments, all food, all.  Fixing my eyes on Him the moment I wake up and seek Him each moment through the day, every step, for His direction.  When food comes into the picture, whether physically I see it or mentally I think about it, immediately focus on Him, fix on Him, seek His guidance.  I can go in closet or bathroom and pray for His will and for Him to give me the will to do His will and line my heart up with His.  Dwell in Him.  Rest in Him.  Stay in each moment and rest in Him, don't get ahead of Him.

4.  What practices does this passage tell me to do?
Throw off...
Fix eyes on Jesus...
Consider Him and realize I have not yet shed blood like He did in my struggles...

5.  To what degree did Jesus go in removing obstacles?
He shed blood

6.  Pray in response to these things.

Lord.  I need You.  To me in my flesh this seems impossible to do again, to release food and walk by the Spirit, by faith.  But with You it is NOT impossible.  I commit anew, refreshed, my life to You, my food and eating and all areas of my life, help me fall in love with you over again.  Lord I pray you will help me daily walk this out so real that I know what step to take one after another.  Help me to throw off all that hinders me each moment, run to you and run with endurance where you put me, to fix my eyes on You continually and each moment when I think it is too hard please help me consider You and what you went through for me.  In Jesus Name, Amen

Be Vulnerable and Step Out

I want to be vulnerable and step out in faith with the Lord's help.  I have been in denial for much too long.  I have hidden a little so that I did not have to be vulnerable because, well, lets face it, I think we all enjoy comfort and being out of that comfort zone is not what we crave.  But I do crave to be in God's will and if being challenged, vulnerable, and living in each moment depending on Him is what is going to bring me results in my heart as well as physically.

I think sometimes even though we may not say what we are feeling, the way we act and live out our life explains what we are feeling.  I have gained weight and been stuck in a defeated attitude the past two years.  I have not surrendered all in this area.  I have held back.  But my weight gain and the way I feel physically is the fruits of those actions.

So here I am...wanting to step out here and journal my way through really surrendering and letting go of food and depending on the Lord falling in love with Him more every day.  I can do this.  I can do ALL things through Christ who strengthens me. is that going to look.  Its going to show some messy things, some failures, and a lot of victory.  What the Lord has shown me to do that I have NOT fully done is, as I have shared before, to eat only when I am physically hungry and eat until I have had just enough (not too much)...and also to eat foods that make my body strong and He will lead me in this as I listen and trust Him.

Stepping out, transitioning my ways, into a new way of living.  Lord I commit this to you...please help me as I surrender and come to you just as I am, a mess who has been feeling defeated for far too long and not allowed You to do all the work in me that you want.  Take my fears and hesitations.  In Jesus Name, Amen

Heart song for me today...

Love to you...more later...Rest in Him

Sunday, September 4, 2011

Day 53 Bible in 90 Days

I am more than halfway through with reading the Bible, the entire Bible, through.  I am so excited to be being filled daily with God's Word.  I am behind two or three days but praying I catch up soon.

The Lord is calling me and putting it on my heart to meet with Him in the mornings.  Jesus Calling by Sarah Young today was wonderful in reminding me of this.

Right now I am in Isaiah.  It is difficult to understand completely what I am reading, but I know I will remember things as I go back and study.

More later...

God is My Personal Trainer

I had the reminder today that God still is my personal trainer.  I am so prone to just grab other ideas or programs or systems or guidelines to treat my body the way I want or think I should, but God reminds me again that He alone is all I need and He will show me what He wants for me.  For me it is eating when I am hungry, stopping when satisfied, eating foods that make my body strong and a new boundary that I feel He is bringing to my mind that I have heard before is when tempted to put anything to my mouth, wait 5 minutes.  Pray and ask Him why I want to eat and to for Him to fill me up, and if I still want that "thing" after 5 minutes then I can eat it.

I think as I do this more and more it will help me to realize that I really didn't want that "thing" to begin with.  

In "Eating with the King" Terri Rockewell says in regards to getting confused and wanting to turn to many different things:  (Page ix) 

"Oh, I lost 25 pounds in those four months.  But, don't seek Him for that reason!  He's worthy of so much better than that!  The pure JOY I experienced in the process of learning to be fed by my HEavenly Father far surpassed the thrill of tucking in my shirts and wearing belts for the first time since middle school. (But, that was part of the joy that Jesus and I celebrated together.

Our intimacy at that time was meal-by-meal, moment-by-moment.  We celebrated the Lord's Supper all day.  It was true communion as I waited upon Him for true bodily hunger and relied upon Him to show me fullness.  

It really was as simple as that.  Satan likes to confuse us with many options and complex costly weight loss plans and programs.  Jesus simply says, 'Here I am.  I stand at the door and knock.  If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with him and him with me. -Revelation 3:20'"

Stuck is how I've felt the past two years.  Stuck is not where I am staying.  Lord help me press on in blind faith.  Help me to journal all my thoughts and find the lies that I have been believing and give me truths from You to replace those lies, renew my mind Lord and renew anyones mind that is reading this that needs to hear Your truth and stop believing lies and the abundant life in Jesus that you want us to live.  Fill us up Lord, in Jesus Name, Amen

Love to you...more later!

Thursday, September 1, 2011

Being still

I am being quite and still as I can and listening to the Lord through my days.  Letting Him lead.  I don't have a lot to share right now but these two songs that He put on my heart the other day.  He is teaching me to "chill out" and stop controlling and focus on Jesus.  That is my daily lesson right now for a while, as long as He sees fit until its a renewed mind of just doing that habitually, maybe forever :)  So these songs really were great to listen to.

This one helped me when I condemn, feel guilty, feel like I am falling short, He played this song on K-love at the PERFECT time, isn't He perfect like that?!

This next song also I heard while listening to K-Love and Plumb was on with them talking and sharing.  She said God had to teach her that He was the only one who could satisfy her...she would get all stressed out thinking she needed to do "this" exercise, eat "this" way, read "this" book on parenting, etc.  He was the only one alone she needed and He told her to "chill out" and that He loved her, to calm down, be still, just stop.

More to you!